Bedtime Story
by MonsterShipper
Summary: My weird crack ship of Cronus x Karkat. A marriage story being told to their kids. HumanStuck AU/ Slight use of course language and very seldom sexual references.
1. Chapter 1: A bedtime story

Bedtime story  
"Tell us a bedtime story!"

"Yeah! Come on mama, please~?"

The small, high-pitched voices of two young children filled the room as they asked their simple request. The mother, Karkat, merely nodded and sat beside his little son and daughter.

"Okay, okay. If it'll get the two of you to shut your traps and sleep, then I'll tell you the story of how I met your father, Cronus Ampora." He smiled as he said the name and tucked the children in.

"I met your father many years ago, it'll be seven years next month actually. We met at the resturant I was working at..."

...

It was an average day for Karkat Vantas, he had just begun his shift at his father's resturant when the lunch rush hit. "Oh my gog...why am I always stuck working during the busiest part of the entire fucking day?" He mumbled to himself, making sure his older brother, Kankri, didn't hear him. The last thing he needed was a drawn out lecture.

The bell that hung over the door rang, signaling the first customer of the day. "Welcome to Abscond, the finest eatery around." Kankri piped from in the kitchen. "My younger sibling will escort you to your seat." As Karkat approached the man he instantly knew who he was. "Welcome...sir. Table or booth?"  
"Table for one doll, unless ya' wanna join me, 'cause that's okay too~"

Cronus Ampora, the eldest son of a very wealthy family. He came to the resturant every day and was always the first one to arrive. He always loved to tease Karkat, but he seemed to have some respect for Kankri. Why wouldn't he? They were best friends in highschool.

"Mr. Ampora, I'm sure you remember our strict 'coat and tie' policy..." Karkat looked him over in disgust. How dare he have the nerve to come in here everyday dressed as a pauper, never wearing anything but ripped jeans, old sneakers, and a white tank top. "I may have to escort you out."

The much taller male just grinned down at Karkat, dressed up in a red and black suit, per usual. Cronus ran a hand through his greased hair and leaned down so they were at eye level. "Aw come on~ I'll give ya' a big tip if ya' let me off the hook." He pulled a twenty dollar bill out of his wallet and put it in Karkat's shirt pocket.

Karkat sighed and ushered him in. What could he do? He really needed the money anyways. "Right this way, I have a table ready for you." He showed Cronus the table and handed him a menu. "If you're ready, I'll take your fucking drink order now and come back for the food order later."

Cronus shook his head and handed Karkat the menu. "I'll have a glass of red wine and a large order of you~" He winked at Karkat as he took the menu.

Karkat instantly blushed a dark red and growled. "H-hey! Stop being a fucking creep and order already!" He flinched as Kankri came over and slapped him in the back of the head with a menu.

"What have I told you time and time again about your horrid language? The last thing this establishment needs is you fouling up the place with your cursing and bad attitude!"

Cronus stood up and lightly patted Kankri on the head. "Hey Kanks, calm down man. I provoked him and I'm the one who ya' should be yellin' at. Leave your lil' bro alone." He smiled softly and sat back down. "I'll just take the sixteen ounce ribeye, meduim-rare if ya' don't mind."  
Kankri eyed the two, but sighed and nodded. "As long as you aren't angered by my sibilings antics, then I will take my leave. Karkat, get the wine please and your steak is on it's way."  
Karkat threw confused glances between the two males, but nodded and walked to the wine cellar. He thought to himself as he strode down the aisle of wine, searching for the correct bottle. Though he'd never admit it and he did truely dispise Cronus, he'd be a liar if he said the wealthy patron wasn't attractive. His slick, black hair, the sharp angles of his face, and his toned muscles. Before he knew it Karkat was starting to blush. "Aw fuck! Maybe I can just wait down here until it goes awa-"

"Karkat! Did you find the wine?"

"Oh shit, Kankri!" Karkat grabbed the bottle and quickly ran up the small stairs and to Cronus' table. "Here you go Mr. Ampora."  
Cronus smiled in amusement and and took the wine grasiously. "Just call me Cronus. That Mr. Ampora crap his gettin' old." He chuckled as Kankri walked over to the table, plates and bowls in hand.

"Pardon me Karkat and watch your hands Cronus, the plate is overly heated." Kankri smiled and went back to the kitchen, leaving the two alone. It only took a moment before Cronus spoke up.

"So doll, since there aren't any customers comin' in, why don't you have a seat with me? Just for moment of course." Cronus stood up and held the chair out for Karkat to sit. "Don't worry, Kankri ain't watchin' us." He smiled at the smaller male and eventually convinced him to sit down.

After having his chair pushed in Karkat looked quizzically at the suave gentleman across from him. Holy fuck was he gorgeous and...wait...is he staring back at you?!

"Enjoyin' the view Karkat?" Cronus was cutting into his rather large steak, looking up only to wink at Karkat, sending shivers down his spine and making him blush.

"W-what the fuck are you talking about idiot?" Karkat growled, the blush obvious on his cheeks. "I wasn't even looking at you..." He fiddled with his hands, looking down as he did so, when much larger hands took his. "H-huh?" He looked up to see Cronus leaning across the table and looking at him with a bemused grin.

"Doll face...I mean, Karkat." Cronus' facial expression softened and he looked at the other gingerly. "Would you like to catch dinner with me tonight?" He quickly retreated his confidence. "I mean, if you want to that is...After you get off?"


	2. Chapter 2: A plan set in motion

Karkat was silent for a few moments, still in shock over the suprise invitaion. 'He wants to have dinner with me? Is this a date? Hell, is this even real?' He thought a while longer before Cronus' slightly gruff voice broke the silence.

"Well? Wadd'ya say?" All the while Cronus was smiling and patiently waiting for an asnwer to his question. Karkat swallowed and tried to utter a sentence without stuttering.

"I...Well uhm...I mean.." He failed miserably.

"Karkat! You are still a member of this staff and as such you should be attending do the duties of your specific job, which happens to be waiting on customers, not fraternizing with them! Father would be horribly dissapointed in your recent behavior and blah, blah, blah."

Kankri continued to talk as Karkat stood up, ignoring the self proclaimed words of wisdom. "I'll be right out with a dessert menu Cronus, excuse me." Just as he turned to leave he saw the look of disappointment lingering in Cronus' shimmering purple eyes. "And as for you're shitty surprise question...I'd enjoy that." He nodded towards Cronus with a slight smile and quickly walked to the kitchen where he was promptly nagged at.

...

The time was seven o' clock. Karkat's shift had finally ended and he rushed to change into his black, turtleneck sweater and black slacks. Oh my gog was his outfit bland. As he waved goodbye to Kankri and the other workers he saw his 'date' leaning against a white Mustang, gold trim and all. "Yet he doesn't even have a fucking suit.." He grumbled under his breathe as he walked over.

"Are ya' ready for the best date you've ever had?" Cronus had somehow managed to snake an arm around Karkat's shoulders and pull him way too close for comfort.

Karkat tried to push him off to no avail. "Yeah, I guess so...but if you make any of your smooth passes then you'll loose a fucking arm."

Cronus moved his arm with a slight smirk and opened the passenger door for Karkat to get in. "Oooh~ I like 'em fiesty." He winked at Karkat and grinned happily as he watched him buckled himself in.

"Shut your fucking gape hinge Ampora." Karkat growled and flicked off the happy-go-lucky man standing at the car door. "Just start this death wagon on wheels and let's get going."

Cronus laughed and rubbed the hood of his car with affection. "Come on now doll, this car is my baby~" Karkat grumbled, but was currently wishing he was the car right now. Was he really jealous of an inanimate object? Yes, yes he was.

The car suddenly started, bringing Karkat back to reality. "So, I forgot to ask...Where the fuck are we even going?"

Cronus giggled, yes, he _giggled._ It was the sexiest thing Karkat had ever heard as he watched the other dig into a bag beside him. "It's a surprise doll, so let me put this on ya'." He held out a blindfold and lightly moved Karkat's head towards him.

All Karkat could think of is why Cronus had a blindfold in his car. He shrugged it off and allowed himself to be blinded temporarily. "Okay, now what? You aren't going to make me guess are you?" He blushed lightly, wondering how close Cronus was to him.

"Well...it'd be pretty cute if you did." Cronus grinned and winked, forgetting that Karkat couldn't see either of the two things. "But I ain't gonna force ya' or nothin'."

There it was again, the thick, greaser accent Cronus had always had. Well, technically it had never left him. Never the less, it was intoxicating. The slight wave of his w's and v's, the intriguing slang he'd work in to almost every sentence, and his accent from god only knows where. Karkat wanted to hear him talk, but he didn't want to play into his hands, so he simply sat quietly while Cronus turned on the radio and drove away.


End file.
